fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
