You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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