Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize