dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
