it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
