Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
