yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
