smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
