So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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