she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
We are all done wearing pants today
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
