I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
