omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize