"it" just moved
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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