I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
