Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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