no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
