i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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