I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize