...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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