when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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