That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
