yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
