Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
