MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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