god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
