do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize