Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
