So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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