Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
