Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
