Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize