but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Your dad touched me again.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
