If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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