Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
