And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
people are starting to question the shark bite story
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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