it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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