I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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