New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
