butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
