Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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