This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
