His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize