How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
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