drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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