why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I think I sprained my soul last night
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
