I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Randomize
