IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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