We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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