i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
i believe in u and ur pee
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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