it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
My pussy is not your playground.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
